Thursday, May 31, 2012

Bucket List

I have been all gloom and doom lately.  So much so that I failed to mention that 2 short weeks ago I was able to mark something off of my ever expanding bucket list.  I saw Van Halen in concert with David Lee Roth.  That happened to be on my list for years, and I did it!

As we go into summer, I am going to sit down and do a real bucket list.  All those things that I want to do before I kick the bucket.  No, my cancer diagnosis is not the inspiration for this.  I have always had an informal, ongoing list of things that I want to do before I go.

Tuesday, May 29, 2012

I'm So Tired

In order for the RAI to really work I have to go into a state of hypothyroidism.  When I was given this news, I thought, oh well, so 4 weeks will be tired.  Small price to pay for a cure.  I take that back!  I am into week 2 of not having a thyroid while not taking any supplementation for that missing thyroid.  I am in hell!  I have never, not ever felt this way before. I am tired, but can't sleep at night.  My muscles ache, I am depressed, I am gaining weight, I am cold, I am pissed!

I am too tired to get out of bed to walk my daughter to the bus in the morning, finite days that she wants to be with me are slipping away.  I spent Memorial Day weekend in the a daze, trying to be normal for everyone's benefit because I feel guilty if I don't.  I lay in bed at night with my legs twitching because i suddenly have restless leg syndrome.  I wake up every hour, on the hour for some unknown reason.  I thought I was at least going to catch up on some sleep during this.  I am wallowing in self pity, which makes me angry at myself, because I am lucky to have a cancer with a cure.  I should be happy, but I am not happy.

I want my life back.  I want my thyroid back.  I want my job back.

Sunday, May 27, 2012

Back to the Frugal Grindstone

Being out of work, all be it temporary, has brought my frugality back to the surface.  I will be honest, the last year of a second income was nice.  Really nice.  So nice, that I often sacrificed what I believed in, finding the best price, for convenience.  How easy it is to buy prechopped vegetables or eat lunch out more than I should.  But, until at least July, no paycheck for me.  With that, I am back to coupon clipping, receipt checking and buying on sale.  Here is a list of the things I did this week in an effort to be frugal.

1.  Used Justice coupons with 40% off to buy $80 worth of pajamas for $28.00.

2.  Took my girls out for ice cream, used a 50% of coupon

3.  Drove very, very little.  I haven't driving much at all in fact.  Hypothyroidism will do that to you.

4.  Made major changes to our auto insurance, saving us $173/6 months.

5.  Changed our gym membership from family to individual

6.  Will stay home tonight and watch a movie at home instead of going to the theatre.

7.  REALLY analyzed our energy bill and figured our where we need to cut back.

8.  Paid off the credit card ( I do that every month, but that counts)

9.  Order a free sample of K-cups for our coffee maker

10. Returned stuff to Bath and Body Works that I didn't need.

I figure this week I saved us $400.  Not too shabby.  What can I do next week?